Way back in 1988 I had a very standard lunch, which I earned each day by working in the junior high snack bar: one pizza pocket, two milks, and one berry snack pie. The pie was of a very popular brand at the time, one that we would all recognize as snacks with the mostess. As an adult, I have recently been on the lookout for that satisfying gastronomical phenomenon that those pies provided way back when. Unfortunately, whether it be a change in parent company or the reconfiguration of ingredients, that brand's products just don't provide me with the same full taste and flavor that I had known and loved as a kid. What to do then? Set out to find a pie that at least comes close. Luckily for all of us, the snack industry is a plethora of brands all competing for our mouths. Worry not, I've done the hard work for you and narrowed it down to a clear winner, as well as some good runners up.
Before the big reveal, I want to be clear that I have kept my research for this post to only pies, cherry pies to be exact. While berry is my favorite, they are not as common, at least in my area, and not common among brands. Cherry is a very close runner up to my favorite berry, as well as an industry standard. Therefore, it is a fantastic focal point for my quest. And before you bombard me with attempts to convince me no snack pie holds up against your grandma's homemade variety -- this is a given. I would never suggest that a mass produced snack pie is any match for a scratch made pie of any kind. It's a wholly different category, one that I may broach in the future, but let's agree -- we all need to indulge in a little gluttony on occasion, and what better food for satisfying the sweet tooth than sugar-laden, 99 cent, handheld pockets of deliciousness? For heavens sake, don't look at the calories!
So what criteria did I evaluate? At the basic level there are only two: crust and filling. But let us not pretend that each of those do not have nuances that the experienced eater doesn't notice. The crust for example can range from dry to moist, from flaky to doughy, and flavorful to -- let's say, cardboardy. And, while the crust takes center stage as the first component that one encounters, and the package that holds it all together, the filling can, in my opinion, if adequately composed, be the anchor that brings the whole eating experience together, or the disappointing dollop of gelatin that some brands hope you don't recognize as artificially flavored goo.
What was the winner of my month long quest? Yes, I had to taste daily, have multiple tastings per brand, and not overindulge, as to have a fresh palate for each tasting. It was quite the sacrifice, but well worth it to bring you the most accurate results. The winner is a pie that started off with a burst of sweetness, just what I'm looking for in a snack. The crust was neither moist nor dry, it had a delicate feel to the tooth, but stood up well throughout the chewing process. I wouldn't call it flaky, but I also wouldn't characterize it as doughy, which some brands were, which is a very off-putting texture to be sure. It had flavor! Not a flavor that is extremely distinct, but definitely the flavor of ground wheat one would expect in a pastry. It is the type of crust that I could and would enjoy all by itself, should the opportunity to do so be presented. Several other brands had crust qualities that I would rank as acceptable, but this brand was well above the average.
The filling definitely warrants a new paragraph. I found a wide degree of separation between the filling of the winner and every other pie I tried. Did I mention I tried seven different brands? Anyway, the winner's filling was outstanding. First and foremost it had a balance of sweetness to tartness that no other brand exhibited. In most fruit pies, there must exist a level of tartness that reacts on the tongue to excite the reception of the contradicting sweetness. Without this, the flavor of the fruit, in this case cherries, does not pop. I want to taste cherries. Along with tasting cherries, I want to feel cherries. Yes, many brands lacked actual cherries in their filling. The winner, while not the density of cherries one would like to see in a homemade pie, clearly used real cherries as a base for the filling. Lastly, the filling was neither gummy nor runny. As to other brands, overly thick and gummy was usually their fault. Cradling the real cherries in the winning pie was smooth glaze that filled the entire pie cavity and provided perfect texture contrast to the crust.
And the winner is ... Tastykake, a brand not well known on the west coast. After reviewing their website and trying their cream-filled chocolate cupcake, I look forward to getting my hands on many of their other concoctions. Not gourmet by any stretch of the imagination, but the Tastykake cherry pie seems to be the perfect treat to satisfy a sweet tooth and bring a rush of childhood memories back to the eater.
Check out their website here: Tastykake Website
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